I'll cut right to it.
I was on the phone with my mom and she said "weren't the pictures of Elizabeth's first Easter cute?" And I said "yeah its great seeing my friends all celebrate their babys' first holidays just like I should be doing" and she said...
"Oh get over it"
Yeah. Seriously. I can't believe it. I promptly hung up so that I wouldn't jeopardize the future possibility that I may ever talk to her again.
My mom is my best friend. We have been so so close. I can always go to her with and for anything. The fact that SHE said that to me has broken my heart and I feel pretty much alone.
And my husband is kinda on her side. He said that yes she really shouldn't have said that, but I shouldn't be mad at her, that she was right for getting upset when I said that.
So basically I have no one. Except Ellen, whom I texted asap and told her what happened. She's the only person who really understands me. And she lives 21 hours away. And you guys.
I mean am I being ridiculous?! SHOULD I be over this?! I mean, yeah it was an early miscarriage and most people don't count it as anything real, but I do and yeah, its has been over a year. But still. I got pregnant, lost it, and have been trying for a whole nother year with NOTHING. I think I deserve to be a little sad still???
Especially seeing my friends dye Easter eggs with their new babies, just like I should be doing?!
I am also so upset that I feel like my relationship with my mother has been altered. Forever. Its been a little strained in the last year because of the m/c and IF but I never in a million years expected her to say that to me. I'll never be able to talk to her the same. Not for a long time anyways...
I just feel really alone and sad right now.
7 years ago