20 Weeks!!!

I am halfway done! I can't believe it! This is such a major milestone for me! I don't know if it is to all preggos out there, but this is so tremendous, and I'm not really sure why! 20 weeks just sounds PREGNANT to me! Like this is totally 100% real, and I am nearing the end. I seriously in all honesty never thought this moment would happen. This morning on my way to work the baby was having a 20 week party in my uterus. he was dancing and celebrating for sure! I think it tired him out because he's been sleeping for the last hour or two. This was a day I never thought I would make. In a month I will hit viability, and there may actually be a chance that I will have a real live baby soon. Wow!

Things I am experiencing, because I know you're DYING to find out!
1. I found stretch marks on my new beautiful baby boobies. Boo.
2. I'm turning into one of those paranoid freak moms. I registered for a breathable bumper, won't be using a positioner, and will have moving air in nursery at all times. I don't mind "leashes" because the thought of my child being snatched right from my hand scares the crap out of me. I sent a scary scary crash test baby video to my in laws because they think car seats are stupid. They're stupid...
3. My belly button is stretching. I have an outie in an innie and the innie part is starting to come out a little and there is another tiny innie under the main innie that you couldn't see unless you moved the big innie out of the way. Gross I know. Plus the bottom hole of my past belly button piercing is no longer IN my belly button. It's above it.
4. I have a HINT of a linea n-whatever. The dark line that cuts your belly in half. It's really low, not all the way to the mutant button yet.
5. 2nd trimester was supposed to be full of energy and sex? No way. I am so freaking tired I could die and sex? You have GOT to be kidding me. You know when you're constipated and have a huge poop stuck in your butt? That's what it feels like in my vagina. Go away leg humping husband.
6. Babycenter and TheBump newsletters jinxed me. I wasn't having midnight leg cramps until those biatches sent me about 28 emails warning me about them. Thanks y'all!
7. Baby boy showed off his man business Monday. On his uncle's birthday. I think that was a sign he's going to take after his Uncle M who never passes up a chance to chase my husband and his friend around with his wiener, delighting in their girlish screams and attempts to hide in closets and under tables with their poor faces covered.
8. Bumble B doesn't want to give all his love away yet. Definitely a mama's boy! He only kicks for me, and when daddy puts his hand on my belly, it's over. I'm considering exclusively breast feeding so he'll love me more than anyone else. How evil is that?
9. I realized that Caffeine Free Pepsi really doesn't taste bad. It almost tastes just like Diet. the hubster got me the wrong kind. I was so desperate I drank it anyways, and now if that's the only option, I have no qualms cause it's JUST as yummy!
10. Bumble B likes Sweettarts!!!!!