Lots Of Babies?

So I have been joking that I'm having twins. I told everyone I have twins in there, and I'm calling them Madeline and Addison (yes two girls).

Sunday at work I was freaking out about my progesterone and talked one of the Radiologists to order a blood progesterone test for me. Once I had the bloodwork the phlebotomist told me we wouldn't get the results until Tuesday. I was annoyed.

I went up to work today and checked my lab results and my Progesterone is

87.6!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

A normal Progesterone for the entire 1st trimester is 16-90! And mine is 87.6?! I still don't have my betas from yesterday (GRRRRRRRRRR) but I looked it up and a high P can mean multiples!

So my US tech friend scanned me this afternoon and we couldn't really see much (except for the enormous ovarian cysts that I apparently have...) but she said "Okay, that MIGHT be one, and that MIGHT be 2!" So I am going back Friday for another scan.

I've been kind of kidding about knowing there are 2 in there, but now that it may actually be a possibility... WOW!

So if you have experience with high Progesterone and singletons or multiples, let me know! I'm way too impatient to just WAIT for Friday. It seems so far away... :)

UPDATE! My HCG is 575!!!!!!!!!! HALLELUJAH for a high number! I'm baby baking for sure!

Still In Shock

Thanks for all the comments on my last post! I am in absolute shock. I was planning one waiting til my period was late to test, but we were going to be drinking all day Saturday at the Dragon Boat races, so I decided to take one. The rest is history :)

Today I took my butt up to the Doctor's office and got some bloodwork done. I'll have my results tomorrow. I peed in a cup though and I am officially pregnant at my doctor's office! They also told me my due date is January 9th!

I'm not feeling ANYTHING except that I'm HOT and sleepy. I'll take what I can get. I wish I was like worshiping the porcelain Gods, but I'll just wait. Hopefully I'll feel bad soon. I'm having that nagging pressure cramping deep down low, but I keep telling myself it's normal!!!

I really could use tons of prayers right now. This baby is a miracle and I am so excited about her. I want to hug and kiss her smiley face in 9 months!

Totally Unexpected!!!!

12DPO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



(PLEASE if you know me in real life, SHHHHHHHH)

God's Time

This is kinda part two of yesterday's post. This is something I hear from people all the time too.

"May be it's not God's time for you yet."

Or something along the line that God doesn't want me to be a mom yet. They always say it's not His plan. Well you know what, I want it to be His plan.

This is always a tricky one. I want to say something smart-ass and witty without sounding sacrilegious.

And I don't really get the phrase anyways. Should we all just sit around? I mean, some of us would never get pregnant. Some woman can't get pregnant without IVF, IUI, drugs, etc. Does God not want us to have kids? And if He didn't want us to be moms then why are there success stories?

I guess this is one of those posts where I am talking about being a Christian but I am questioning my God and faith. It's not like I'm questioning who my God is, I'm just questioning "WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO?!"

I think I would be a great mom and I have always been amazing with kids and babies. I don't think God would have given me that gift and this want for children (since I was a child myself) if He didn't want me to be a mommy. It just wouldn't make sense. Unless it's some sick joke, and I refuse to believe that that's the case.

But sometimes I think about it and I really think that this isn't my time. I mean what else is the problem? It's not from lack of trying, that's for sure. I just need to sit back and pray and hope for my miracle.

Update: Just saw my ticker and it says I've been TTC for 17 months. 17 months today. I know for some that doesn't sound like a long time, but for me it sounds soooo long. I hope this happens for me soon. Looking at the bills rolling in, I don't know how far I can go right now.

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Christopher and I got our Bentley Bracelets yesterday! I'm very excited and can't WAIT for someone to ask me what it is for. (We're looking a little rough, it's like 11pm after Dragonboat Race practice and we were exhausted! LOL)

Here's a picture of Bentley with her bracelets!!!

The Things People Say

I'm coming up to TTC for a year and a half, and the comments are just ROLLING in.

I stopped talking about TTC at work because 1. It really is no one's business, and 2. I was tired of hearing "You're trying to hard, just relax" from people that have never ever been in my situation before in their lives.

The "trying too hard" is the most common comment I get and it makes me SOOOO mad. If someone wanted something really really bad, they would try really hard to get it right? A degree, a dog, a diet pepsi, a better golf swing, a better credit report, a new mattress, an early chemo appointment, a new car, etc etc. I could go on for hours. So what is so wrong with trying hard to have a baby? And I don't really see what the big difference is between trying and not. His you know what is in my you know where the same as if I was ovulating, trying or drunk. What's the big deal?!

My mother is trying really hard now not to say anything bad. Even after she told me play by play of a baby shower I skipped, she is trying. She said "you can't have a baby because I could never love anyone as much as I love you." Like I said, she's trying.

Yesterday at work a guy said his wrist hurt which just set the ball rolling for very inappropriate non-workplace jokes. Then I said "You should donate your sperm" and he said he wouldn't want his kids running around if he couldn't raise them. I told him he would make someone very very happy and he said "It's not my responsibility to help some misfit that can't get pregnant on their own" or something to that degree.

Yeah. Seriously. So I told him I was one of those misfits that he was talking about and that this was National Infertility Week and he needs to watch what he's saying cause that was NOT funny. I said some other things in my rant, but I don't remember. He promptly apologized and I think generally felt bad. I think if he was having an actual educated conversation he may have not said the same thing, but who knows.

By the way, I shook his Mountain Dew bottle up. A lot.

National Infertility Week

Is everyone enjoying basking in the glow of their IF this week? I didn't think so.

Ellen and I decided to drink tequila and wear cute non maternity dresses and stay out all night to celebrate. I think it's appropriate! The V List jumped out of planes. I don't have the guts for that!

I actually posted Resolve's Infertility Etiquette on my Facebook and have been getting positive feedback. Of course at the beginning I DID say if you don't like it don't read or comment, so I don't know if anyone hated it. After a huge fight broke out with the Infertility VS Paraplegia post... I went ahead and put a disclaimer. I also got my first "you're too young for infertility" comment yesterday.

If you've been following me on Twitter you will have seen lots of instances where I have just wanted to kick IF, or whoever is closest's, butt. First my mother went on for 30 minutes about every little detail of a baby shower I skipped. I skipped 2 this weekend, and I'm PROUD OF IT! My board's Question Of The Day was what plans do we have for Mother's Day. I responded Tequila ;) Also you will see a Retweet I tweeted of a girl who thinks the little cups that you put condiments in would be perfect of pee cups for dipping HPTs. Thank you for that, I'm on it! Also I am in a race to beat In Due Time to 100 followers, so if you have Twitter, FOLLOW ME!!!!

I also said some pretty big prayers last night for Stellan, April, and Kayleigh. (and of course my prospective child that may or may not be implanting tomorrow... <---awesome link BTW)

Tell me how you are celebrating IF week!

Molleigh Anna

I made a really hard decision this week. I gave Molleigh Anna to a new home with a new mommy.

Molleigh and Maddox spend all their time outside (thanks to Maddox. I'm sure Molleigh curses the day he became to big and obnoxious for the house) unless it's cold winter nights or storms. The summer they are stuck outside because our air conditioner is broken and it's cooler in the shade of the trees. Molleigh is the sweetest most loving little thing in the world. We rescued her when she was just skin and bones and showing signs of major abuse. We nursed her back to life into a caring sweet beautiful little girl.

She just doesn't get the attention that she deserves. Niether of them do. A friend of mine just got a fence built in her yard and was talking about wanting a dog and I said "take mine" and the rest is history.

This morning we took her to the vet to get all of her shots updated and took her over to her new home. I am really going to be sad to drive in and out of my driveway every day and not see her run up to greet me or say goodbye. But I know in my heart that I did the right thing. I can still go visit her and take Maddox over to see her (until I find him a suitable and lovable home) and I will see her new mommy every day.

People kinda think I'm a bad person for giving her up, but she deserves so much better than what she has at my house. Her new mommy even went straight out and spent 200 dollars on toys and treats and new shiny bowls for her. I'm so glad that she is somewhere she is going to be loved as much as she deserves. I really think I did the right thing, but I can't help but be a LITTLE sad to see her go!!!


Wow what a mess that house was in back then hahahahaha

My Mother...

My mom and I are still on weird terms from our fall out last week. I just decided to forgive and forget what she said and called her a few times. She just acts distant and what she does say to me is rude and ridiculous. Here are some examples.

#1
Me: Christopher is starting a new anxiety medicine. He has been freaking out and having panic attacks a lot lately. He's really stressed I guess
Mom: Probably because he's trying too hard to get pregnant.
Me: OR He's stressed about our dogs, getting our house fixed, me being sick...

#2
Me: OMG I FOUND MY CAMERA!!!!!!!! (she bought me this camera as an early birthday present in December and I lost it in January, which she was obviously upset about)
Mom: Did you find my DVD player?
Me: Ummm No I know where that is...

#3
Me: Can I borrow your tent?
Mom: Why can't you use your other one?
Me: Well it's a pain to put up. I like yours cause it pops up like my broken one did
Mom: Well are you going to break it too?
Me: Umm noo.... I won't leave it out in the wind to dry...

It doesn't sound like much, but those are the 3 conversations we have had in a week, and that is pretty much as far as they have gone. I called her back after one convo to ask something, and she sounded like she had been crying, and I asked what was wrong and she said nothing. So IDK. I've tried. I kinda miss her... She has off today and she always calls me when she's off to see what I'm doing. Nothing. Christopher said that it will get better soon and get back to normal. I sure hope so. How am I going to tell her I'm pregnant if I get pregnant this cycle or ever if she doesn't even want to talk to me? I guess I will just go on with life and she will eventually come around? I don't know why SHE is mad at ME?! I didn't do anything! It is all very frustrating...

Hi!!!!!!

Hello ICLWers!!!
I've done this a few times, but never given a little hello. Thought I would follow the trend of introducing myself!

My name is Katie. I'm an xray tech and I also babysit a little boy who is almost 1. My husband is Christopher and he works for the government company that send our soldiers overseas their vehicles. He's the last inspector to check them off before they set sail! We both love our jobs, which I count as an amazing blessing. We live in Charleston, SC and have 4 dogs and 1 kitten!

We've been TTC since Dec 07. We went off of BCP and just wanted to see what would happen. In March we decided to really try, and I got pregnant. Then I miscarried at 5 weeks. We've been trying ever since, and I am now on my first round of Clomid. We've made the decision of going possibly as far as IUI but adopting instead of IVF, and we feel really great with our decision.

Thanks so much for stopping by! I can't wait to read your comments and visit your blogs!!!

Sock Exchange!

Kym started a sock exchange this year! I've met some really cool bloggers through it all and really connected with some old friends! The socks are to represent the warm fuzzies that we feel through our bloggers friends and comments. My sock buddy was Jennifer. She sent me some super cute Hello Kitty socks! They are so adorable! Every time I see them and wear them I think about all of you who have given me great advice, support, or just a quick hello. It's crazy to know how many friends I have through the internet. It really is GREAT!





I sent socks to Ellen. It was so funny because as some of you may know, Ellen is a BFF! I was so so so stoked to be her buddy. We were discussing what kind of socks we liked and wanted so I definitely cheated! I think she was as excited as I when she got them!!!